Sunday, May 15, 2011

LapBand fails. This is apparently up to me.

So, no, it's not necessarily that the LapBand has failed doctor has.  If you go back and read the last few posts, you'll know that my doctor is not interested in me or my well being, and the search for a new doctor has been put on the back burner in lieu of the millions of irons I have in the fire related to my career at the moment.  So what to do?  Take charge of my life again.  Who cares if my band is working with me or not?  Bottom line is that I can get certain foods down and I know the essentials of weight loss - healthy eating choices, small portions and exercise.  I'm doing this my way, now.  Who needs follow up care?  I can take Prevacid for the acid reflux if it gets unbearable (although I've found tricks to deal with it - smoothies, frappuccinos, etc.), and I have just learned that there are foods I just can't tolerate anymore (bread, tomatoes, lettuce, etc.).  Until I can get with a doctor who would actually like to work with me and figure out whether or not my band has slipped, moved...whatever...I'm doing this my way.

I put my bodybugg on again, it's been awhile since I've worn it.  I counted calories, measured food and entered them into my bodybugg fitness program today.  Hell, I even went to the gym here at my apartment complex and did some wogging (walking/jogging) tonight:


It's been MONTHS, literally, since I've paid attention to what I've put into and what I've gotten out of my body.  Why?  I convinced myself that there was nothing I could do until the doctor fixed me.  I lived on what foods I could tolerate - ignoring calorie counts - because I lost my judgment and personal accountability.  For some reason, nachos go down really well for me (I order them without tomatoes)...but how many freakin' calories is a plate of steak nachos from my fave Mexican joint?!  I've been stopping at my fave coffee place every morning - Java Detour - and ordering up the 32 oz. Black & White blended, nonfat with an extra shot...I can't find nutrition information for it, but I can't imagine it's low in calories.  I haven't seen a treadmill in months, because "I'm too tired."

I spent 29 years of my life being "too tired" and indulging in all of the crap my body wanted.  It's time to stop.  No more blaming the doctor or a seemingly broken LapBand.  No more.  I weighed in this morning at 232.4 pounds, which is a measly loss of about 18 pounds since Christmas.  Are you kidding me? My original goals had me hitting 200 by the end of May and my goal of 169 by my birthday (August 28th).  I've revised that tonight.

Goal #1: 200 pounds by August 28, 2011
Goal #2: 169 pounds by December 31, 2011

Hitting my goal weight by the end of 2011 can happen.  I just have to pull my head out of my ass and make it happen.  I need to count/log calories, because the alternative doesn't hold me accountable.  I need to get to the treadmill at least three times a week, because the alternative is doing nothing for me.  Yes, the LapBand is still restricting me on portion sizes and some foods (although I find it funny I can eat steak nachos, but not a salad)...I'll take that and make this thing work for me.